Airwolf

Each week I travel back and forth between Vancouver and Victoria so I can tattoo at both Tattoo Zoo in Victoria, and Sacred Heart Tattoo in Vancouver. On average, this round trip eats up ten hours of my week.

If you're on a budget (which I try to be), the time-consuming commute between Tsawwassen and Swartz Bay can be a real sonofabitch. Other times, on a rare warm night sitting on the outside deck of the ferry with a cold beer it's pretty damn picturesque.

Occasionally, when I've had enough of the "Planes, Trains, and Automobiles" of it all I'll indulge my inner Donald Trump and fly across on a float plane which reduces the one-way trip time from five hours to a breezy 35 minutes

The cost to save yourself four-and-a-half hours of commuting time? $152.26.

For comparison's sake the same trip taking five hours on (mostly) public transit costs $30, a fifth of the cost of the plane.

Which brings us to the current week and the reason for the title of this post. I neglected to book a float plane in a timely fashion and was left with a decision: wake up at 5am and undergo the protracted-yet-cost-effective trek on public transit only to arrive at noon in Victoria or spend a few day's wages and sleep in an extra three hours and fly across on… a helicopter!!!

I should mention here I've been obsessed with helicopters since Airwolf first aired during my impressionable youth. And yet before today I had never flown in a helicopter.

I hung out in Vancouver's Helijet lounge with its resident kitty, "Rotor". He does a fantastic job of being adorable, inspecting baggage, and mousing.

Then it was on to the tarmac to board the Sikorsky which looks kinda similar to the Bell 222 (the Airwolf Model), don't it?

Idling, or whatever you call it in a helicopter, felt like being inside one of those wobbly dog toys: you're very conscious there's four giant blades spinning incredibly fucking fast just inches above your head - their motion creates a serious bounce in the passenger compartment.

Taking off was surreal and effortless - like the hand of God plucked the thing up and gently lifted us into the sky. Thankfully the wobbliness subsided as things got underway for an otherwise smooth flight.

Whereas the float plane docks just steps from the front door of our tattoo shop, the helicopter terminal is out near Ogden Point and requires a $10+ taxi ride to the shop.

My verdict: it's the float plane for utility and the helicopter for novelty. I leave you with some spoken word by Ernie Cline, just scroll down and check his bit on Airwolf, it's well… Airwolf!!!